Seth Rogen! Shit, here we go. Hey. How's it going, man? Yeah, good. So, you, like, always play, like, the same guy in every movie. When are you gonna do some, like, real acting, man? Okay, thank you. Give me something. Give me, like, the laugh, man. Give me the Seth Rogen laugh. Seth Rogen, everybody. All right, I've landed. I'm here. We've said our hellos. Can we please go to fucking Carl's Jr.?
This Is the End
23.8s
Oh, hey, John! Over here! Welcome to Los Angeles International Airport. Attention, all passengers. Do not leave your baggage unattended. All unattended baggage is subject to search... Yay! We're so happy! Look at this! What's happening, man? Good to see you, buddy. How you doing? I'm good, man. Yes, you are.
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11.6s
Oh. I would... I would love to. I'm on a... I can't really eat that stuff right now. I'm on a, uh... What? I'm on this cleanse. You're... You're on a what? I'm on a cleanse.
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6.1s
How long has it been, man? Sometime in the last... Inside of a year or something. Yeah. I have the best weekend ever planned, man.
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4.3s
Each bite is better than the previous bite. It is. Gluten!
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2.3s
Lay it on me. Ooh! I don't want to ruin it.
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49.2s
Oh, it's so bright in here. It is fucking bright. Oh, I'm so high. There's so many delicious choices. What do I do? I'm gonna get something to drink. Okay. Excuse me, would it be possible for my daughter to use your restroom? She's really got to go. Read the sign. Customers only. Seriously? Why the fuck you think I put up the sign? It's okay, Dad. I can hold it. Let's just buy something for your mother. Yeah, well, I guess you better, huh? This cash register lady is mean. I have anxiety. Will you buy this for me? When I'm stoned, I can't do this. I think I'm just gonna head back to your place. I'm not really liking it very much over there at Franco's. Dude, I want you to get to know these guys. That's never gonna happen if you don't put in any effort whatsoever, okay? I hate it in there. I just want to drink some pop and smoke some weed.
This Is the End
12.7s
And Danny fucking eats me. Why does he eat you? I don't know. I'm just trying to think of, like, the nastiest way to go. Yeah, he could eat you. Okay. That's a good idea, man. He's just out of his mind. He just, like, eats me.
This Is the End
13.7s
For you, I will go. I promise, I'll stay with you all night, okay? I won't ditch you. No, 'cause I want to be with you all night. And you know why else? 'Cause nobody puts Jay in the corner.
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5.6s
You let us both cum inside you. Yeah. Icing on the cake. Check it out.
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2.4s
Mmm-hmm. Oh! God!
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1.7s
Holy shit.
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1.4s
What?
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1.5s
Mmm!
This Is the End
1m5s
Holy shit! What happened? Jay, you're alive. Jay. Oh, thank God, Jay. I'm not dead yet. I told you guys not to go outside. What just happened? Jesus Christ, they are all fucking dead. I told you guys not to run outside. You all right? I tried to save Aziz. I tried. You did your best, man. I love you. Why the fuck did you guys run out there? You know what, James, can you lower your voice? You're freaking out Jay! Maybe I'm a little freaked out, too! - He's not as strong as you. - They all fell in. - Look at my house! - I tried to save them. They all fell in. Get your fucking hands off me. Jonah, stop touching me. Can we get Jay some water, please? Can we get him some hydration? - He needs to be hydrated. - The water's not working! Everyone just runs out the door! My phone is dead. Guys, the fucking Internet's not working! Let's watch the TV. Let's check the news. Where is the TV? It's in the floor. In the floor? - Oh, that's dope. - Yeah, cool, huh? That's really neat. That is impressive, James. The biggest earthquake to ever hit Los... Officers urging people to stay in their homes right now. And also reports of looting and rioting are spreading across the city. Riots. Police are pretty much outnumbered as people are turning to one another. Martial law has now been declared. Air Force One has gone down...
This Is the End
38.9s
What the hell was that? It's already going crazy out there, guys. We can't leave. I'm not leaving, okay? I'm a victim. I've had a victim's mentality my whole life. People can smell it on me. When I was a kid, I had man-titties. The bullies held me down, they tittie-fucked me. That's what's happening out there right now. That's right, we are all soft. Yeah. We are all soft! We are actors! We pretend to be hard, man. Yeah. We soft as baby shit. As baby shit, soft as... Wait, Craig, what are you doing, man? Hey, hey, what are you doing? What are you doing to the painting, man? We got to board this shit up, man. Board it up? We got to protect ourselves. We don't know how long we gonna be in here. Okay, chill. There's raccoons, and bandits, and shit out there. This is Obey, man! If you get out the way! This is my favorite fucking painting! What are you doing, Craig? Guys, help. Help. Help. Get off.
This Is the End
19.2s
You heard the TV. The TV said stay here. It said stay in your homes. We need to stay here until they start rescuing people, okay? A huge earthquake happens. Who do they rescue first? Actors. Famous people. They'll get Clooney, Sandra Bullock, me. If there's room, you guys'll come. The point is, is that we're all gonna get out of this first.
This Is the End
14.9s
So I think we should... I think we should probably go back to your place, eh? What are you talking about, man? No, no way. I'm not leaving here. I don't want to die at James Franco's house.