Found 740 results
1m11s
- Goddamn! - Mmm-hmm. Look, don't beat yourself up about it, okay? There is some good news. (IMITATES DENZEL WASHINGTON) If you wanna get with Denzel, he's standing right here! (LAUGHS) Because the real Denzel ain't got shit on me! (BOTH LAUGHING) Honey, how does this monster have five kids? We don't get to have one. Well, his wife looks like she's about 15. Uh... Yeah. My sperm are fine. Right, right. No, I know, honey. We're just gonna... We're gonna keep plugging away until something sticks, okay? Gee, you really sound like a guy who wants to have a kid. Well, you know, I'm just... I'm a little distracted right now, honey, as you might imagine. Look, if you're not into this, you kinda gotta tell me. Listen. I wanna have a baby, but how do I explain this? Um... Do you remember how we used to play Pac-Man at Fisker Lanes and we could play all night? Do you remember this one time, I made it all the way up to level 86, - and you were not too far behind, right? - 85, but... And then I kicked your ass at Galaga. - So anyway, what is the point? - Mmm... Anyway. Do you remember how we stayed alive so long? All we did was we ate the pellets. We never ate the fruit because the fruit is how they get you.
Game Night
2m4s
- Did he get it right? - Huh. I do not know. I realized I've never had one of these, but that is a tasty drink. It's kind of tart. You wanna try it? Oh! Honey! Honey! There's Brooks! Brooks is here. Brooks is here. We're about to win this thing! - Yes, yes! - Look who came in here. Oh! No! I think he made us. So what? It's over. What, are they gonna try to stop us? - Let's go. - Yeah, probably. But that's why I brought this. Jesus Christ, honey! Where did you get a gun? No, no, that's the fake gun from Brooks' fight. Oh, yeah. Boy, that looks real. - Yeah, well, you know... - Look at that. Brooks never spares any expense. - Yeah, that's true. - Okay. Follow my lead, huh? - Why, what are you doing? - Lead? Any of you fucking pricks move, and I'll execute every motherfucking last one of you! Very nice, honey. Pulp Fiction, anybody? Right? It's a classic. We love films. Okay, what the fuck is this shit? Well, you're gonna hand over the keys 'cause we're gonna take my brother. - Bullshit. - Oh, you know what's bullshit is your bald, ugly face. Uh-uh. No, that's personal. Come on, honey, let's just keep it fun. All right, I'm sorry I called you bald, you little bitch! MAX: Well, that's, again, you know... - Let the gun do the talking. - Okay. - Come on. - Ah! On your knees. Hands in the air. Heads on the ground. - Good. Good. Great. - Eyes closed. That's it. Get 'em up, reach for it. - Hands up! That's right. - MAX: There we go. - All right, hands in the air! - Get 'em up! - Yep. - Yo, where's my head go? - Down. - On the floor. Just rest it. How am I supposed to put my hands in the air - with my head on the ground? - Fucking exactly. I did have the same question. (SIGHS) Child's pose? Do you guys know child's pose? Fuck is a child's pose, man? ANNIE: You've never done yoga? - Okay, wow. (SCOFFS) - No? - Cover me. - Show 'em, baby. - All right. Arms out. - Here she comes. Knees apart if you have back problems. And if you're doing it right, you're really gonna feel that lumbar opening up back there. MAX: Let's put your head down. Come on. I don't wanna have to use this. Okay? (CHUCKLES) - (GRUNTS) - Okay. Can't you just tell me who it was? I know you, Kev. If I tell you, you'll just obsess about it even more. Okay, fine. How about this? If I guess it right, you tell me. Fine. Was it an actor? Yes. That tower is unstable. I'm not stable! Was he over 40? Yes. Be careful. Okay. American? Yes.
Game Night
41.2s
Yeah, so along those same lines, I was wondering... And it's totally okay if you haven't, but I was just wondering if you had a chance to read my screenplay? Javi! Can I come or it's only for vip? Uh, Mr. Cage, this is Ms. Gabriela lucchesi. Hi. She runs all of our agricultural operations. And this is my cousin. Lucas Gutierrez. Mr. Cage, we obviously are very excited to have you here. What are you working on next? Well, that's a tough question for an actor to get, but it's fine. Oh. 'Cause I'm no longer an actor. I've retired. What? What do you mean, retired? So, what are you going to do now?
The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent