Hey, Mitch. Your hair looks good. Thanks. Yeah, I had to cut it for a fucking tampon commercial. Uncle Mitch! How's my favorite ballerina doing? - Hi, Uncle Mitch. - Hi! Gosh, you're so light. Are you dieting? Do you want to come to my dance recital? No, honey. The only style of dancing that Uncle Mitch likes involves a big, shiny pole, and a broken woman with daddy issues.
The Change-Up
8.1s
Vegetable medley! - How are you? - Good. - You're good? - Yeah. Are you dating anyone? - You know who I ran into? - Who?
The Change-Up
1.2s
Thank you.
The Change-Up
11s
Honey... Don't even say that. I'm so sorry. I suck. Dr. Tillman said just once a week, for one hour. I'm sorry.
The Change-Up
18.3s
That was three months ago. I know. I heard her. And I want to sit and talk with you for an hour more than once a week, but tonight, I cannot. Why? What are you doing? I promised Mitch I would sit and watch a game with him tonight, and... What? Can we please just slide the Dialogue Night again? I'm so sorry.
What's your name? What's your name? What's your name? Why can't they talk yet? Are they retarded or something? Don't say... You can't say that. Well, this one right here looks a little Downsy. - Or that. - I'm kidding. - A little bit, though? - No. Pumpkin, we'll see you right after the game, okay? Have fun.
The Change-Up
14.5s
This chick does not look happy. I was just saying that I really envy your life. - That's all. - I envy yours. No, you don't. You're just trying to be nice. I'm not. I do, I envy it. No. I envy yours. I wish I had your life.
The Change-Up
16.6s
And sex with strange, new women. You're living the dream. How much fun is it being an actor, working one week a year? I want to smoke weed all day. I want to start a book that I actually finish. I would like to take a nice, solid dump because I'm not constantly stressed out.
The Change-Up
16.3s
Look, shitbird. You got it made! You have an extremely hot wife, and you got a beautiful house that's full of furniture and food and kids. And you make a ton of money. And you come home at the end of the day and you're surrounded by people who give a shit about you.
The Change-Up
11.2s
You're never lonely. What more do you want? I'll tell you what I want, okay? I want something different. I want your life, you know? I want Sabrina. I want Tatiana.
